50,000 before W:O:A 2009!

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

When I capture the enemy, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys if they happen to follow him around.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up, I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say, "And here is the price for failure," and then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If an advisor says to me "My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?", I will reply "This.", and kill the advisor.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I learn that a youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a youth instead of waiting for him to mature.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. And thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and have a friend get it for me.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

Before employing any complicated artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner's manual. I will also be sure to test it before I use it on the enemy.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.