Warthog
W:O:A Metalmaster
I think the conspiracy is much larger than you think.
They clearly must smell bad, as dirty as they look. It is a well known fact that California (where Korn is from) in particular is having continuous problems with droughts and fresh water shortages. So what's the solution? Encourage people to shower and bathe less so they look like those enviable rock stars Korn. This frees up more fresh water for the huge West Coast agricultural conglomerates to irrigate their fields (isn't Korn's bassist named FIELDY? hmm) where they grow genetically altered vegetables with mind-controlling properties.
Slipknot are pawns in this as well - they're 30-somethings straight out of the corn fields of Iowa. Their money goes to support their friends and families back in Iowa. All of whom work in the only business that exists in Iowa - farming corn (Korn?). Increased standard of living leads to increased productivity and greater distribution of, what else? Genetically altered corn with mind-controlling properties.
Linkin Park, with their anime album covers and kirakana-based logo, make music that appeals to the "Import Tuner" crowd: kids driving suped-up silver Hondas, with big ugly spoilers and neon-blue headlights. Honda, under the guise of civic responsibility, will begin mass producing fast cars that run on 100% ethanol fuel, and these will be massively popular and fashionable with the Linkin Park crowd. Ethanol, of course, is derived from grain, hence pumping tons of money into large agricultural conglomerates, who will use that money for more research into developing genetically altered vegetables with mind-controlling properties.
Papa Roach, with their depressed, suicidal lyrics, will continue to be popular with stupid, depressed kids with no self-esteem. These kids, suffering from deep emotional problems, will beginning turning to fast-food for comfort. They will beginning eating McDonalds hamburgers made out of cows who are fed - what else? - genetically altered vegetables with mind-controlling properties.
okay, that's enough.
They clearly must smell bad, as dirty as they look. It is a well known fact that California (where Korn is from) in particular is having continuous problems with droughts and fresh water shortages. So what's the solution? Encourage people to shower and bathe less so they look like those enviable rock stars Korn. This frees up more fresh water for the huge West Coast agricultural conglomerates to irrigate their fields (isn't Korn's bassist named FIELDY? hmm) where they grow genetically altered vegetables with mind-controlling properties.
Slipknot are pawns in this as well - they're 30-somethings straight out of the corn fields of Iowa. Their money goes to support their friends and families back in Iowa. All of whom work in the only business that exists in Iowa - farming corn (Korn?). Increased standard of living leads to increased productivity and greater distribution of, what else? Genetically altered corn with mind-controlling properties.
Linkin Park, with their anime album covers and kirakana-based logo, make music that appeals to the "Import Tuner" crowd: kids driving suped-up silver Hondas, with big ugly spoilers and neon-blue headlights. Honda, under the guise of civic responsibility, will begin mass producing fast cars that run on 100% ethanol fuel, and these will be massively popular and fashionable with the Linkin Park crowd. Ethanol, of course, is derived from grain, hence pumping tons of money into large agricultural conglomerates, who will use that money for more research into developing genetically altered vegetables with mind-controlling properties.
Papa Roach, with their depressed, suicidal lyrics, will continue to be popular with stupid, depressed kids with no self-esteem. These kids, suffering from deep emotional problems, will beginning turning to fast-food for comfort. They will beginning eating McDonalds hamburgers made out of cows who are fed - what else? - genetically altered vegetables with mind-controlling properties.
okay, that's enough.
