50,000 before W:O:A 2009!

[xforeverxmetalx]

If the enemy runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. The middle of a nearly broken rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a enemy, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I am fighting with the enemy atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off when he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw, killing him in the process.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to any heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I'm eating dinner with the enemy, put poison in his goblet, and then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, such as "Align the twelve Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total solar eclipse." Instead it will be more along the lines of "Push the button."

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door or in any way easily accessible.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I ever talk to the enemy on the phone or other similar device, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say that his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation, I will likely turn to the path of righteousness. The enemies are incredibly gullible in this regard.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

If I decide to hold a double execution of the enemy and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the enemy is scheduled to go first.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way, if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it's an emergency, the guard will fetch the medical team instead of opening up the cell.