100K in 100 DAYS before WOA:08!!

[Sipyloidea]

We have all done things we regret or are not proud of, it's part of being human. Don't punish yourself for it. Just know that was not the real you, just a phase you went through due to the pain.

It's hard to accept that it wasn't the real you, when you hate yourself for it

 

[808Metal]

In my last relationship I told him that there was something about me and that I'd tell him, if he wants to know... he never asked for it and I'm certainly glad about it... I still feel myself more as a committer than a victim and don't want people to judge me for it

that's great, don't think of yourself as a victim. And he was not interested, then that's an indication that he's not the right one.

 

[Smoo_lord]

10, 300!

 

[808Metal]

Yeah it messed me up for a while



Yeah bro, but it still can be devastating

hell yes totally devastating, worse than any physical pain by far. I hurt for a long time after that.

 

[Sipyloidea]

Well we have talked them over, she has been through worse than I have so we have helped each other with those things. I love her as much as I could love anyone, I'm I just lost some of what I could have shared with her instead of on that ex girlfriend, I'm more cynical now. Not as romantic I guess, not sure if that's the best way to describe it.

I can understand..

 

[808Metal]

so you are saying you cannot put 100% trust into it then adam?

No not at all, it's not that, I completely trust my wife, more than I ever did that other girl. It's hard to put into words.

 

[Smoo_lord]

that's great, don't think of yourself as a victim. And he was not interested, then that's an indication that he's not the right one.

I am still searching for a meaningful relationship, since the big one, when i was together for 5 years.. just had a few that last a month or so, and I realise that i was kidding myself.. I did not feel the same way, so decided to end it before get too attached

 

[Sipyloidea]

that's great, don't think of yourself as a victim. And he was not interested, then that's an indication that he's not the right one.

It's not that he wasn't interested. He just sensed that it bothered me and didn't want to give me the shame of telling him

 

[808Metal]

I don't look at life and relationships through "rose colored glasses" anymore as the saying goes. In some ways it's better I guess, I'm more realistic in my expectations.

 

[Smoo_lord]

I also lost a lot of friends from this girl.. as we were in the same group of friends sort of, and i couldnt bear to be around her

 

[808Metal]

It's not that he wasn't interested. He just sensed that it bothered me and didn't want to give me the shame of telling him

Oh OK I see, I thought you meant that he did not care.

 

[Sipyloidea]

that's great, don't think of yourself as a victim. And he was not interested, then that's an indication that he's not the right one.

But if I don't feel as victim, I'll blame myself and make me suffer. I spent actually lots of time to convince myself being a victim, to make it end. What would you suggest instead?

 

[Smoo_lord]

Like you said adam, Its hard to put into words yes


but at the moment im quite happy being single, sure it sux sometimes, but its what i know


friends are getting married. having kids etc

 

[808Metal]

I am still searching for a meaningful relationship, since the big one, when i was together for 5 years.. just had a few that last a month or so, and I realise that i was kidding myself.. I did not feel the same way, so decided to end it before get too attached

Mine lasted 3 years. And yeah you can tell much more quickly now when it's not right. Which is a good thing for both involved. So that's a good thing that you did.

 

[Sipyloidea]

I also lost a lot of friends from this girl.. as we were in the same group of friends sort of, and i couldnt bear to be around her

Same here. I lost friends, because they still more stand to his side and because many lost respect of me (not of him though weirdly). I think it's this society thing: I am a slut, he's a hero, though we did the very same thing