Der große Träller und Lyric Thread

[Corpse Culto]

.::Jack Black (Narrator)::..
A long ass f**kin' time ago,
In a town called Kickapoo,
There lived a humble family
Religious through and through.
But yeah there was a black sheep,
And he knew just what to do.
His name was young J.B.
And he refused to step in-line.
A vision he did see of
F**kin' rockin' all the time.
He wrote a tasty jam
And all the planets did align.

..::Jack Black (Son)::..
Oh the dragons balls were blazin'
As I stepped into his cave.
Then I sliced his f**kin' cockles,
With a long and shiney blade!
'Twas I who f**ked the dragon,
F**ka lie sing f**k a loo!
And if you try to f**k with me,
Then I shall f**k you too!
Gotta get it on in the party zone!
I gots to shoot a load in the party zone!
Gotta lick a toad in the party zone!
Gotta suck a chode in the party zone!

AHHHHHHH

..::Meat Loaf (Father)::..
You've disobeyed my orders son,
Why were you ever born?
Your brother's ten times better than you,
Jesus loves him more.
This music that you play for us
Comes from the depths of hell.
Rock and roll's the devil's work,
He wants you to rebel.
You'll become a mindless puppet;
Beelzebub will pull the strings!
Your heart will lose direction,
And chaos he will bring.
You'd better shut your mouth,
You better watch your tone!
You're grounded for a week with no telephone!
Don't wanna hear you cry,
Don't wanna hear you moan!
You gotta praise The Lord when you're in my home!

..::Jack Black (Son)::..
Dio can you hear me?
I am lost and so alone...
I'm askin' for your guidance,
Would you come down from your throne?
I need a tight compadre
Who will teach me how to rock.
My Father thinks you're evil,
But man, he can suck a cock.
Rock is not the devil's work,
It's magical and rad.
I'll never rock as long as I am
Stuck here with my Dad...

..::Ronnie James Dio (Dio poster)::..
I hear you brave young Jables,
You are hungry for the rock.
But to learn the ancient method,
Sacred doors you must unlock.
Escape your father's clutches,
And this oppressive neighborhood.
On a journey you must go,
To find the land of Hollywood!
In The City of Fallen Angels,
Where the ocean meets the sand,
You will form a strong alliance,
And the world's most awesome band!
To find your fame and fortune,
Through the valley you must walk.
You will face your inner demons.
Now go my son and rock!

..::Jack Black (Narrator)::..
So he bailed from f**king Kickapoo
With hunger in his heart.
And he journeyed far and wide
To find the secrets of his art.
But in the end he knew
That he would find his counterpart.
Rooooock!
Rah-ha-ha-ha-hock.
Raye-yayayayaye-ya.

 

[Corpse Culto]

[Beelz] I am complete!

[Both] Fuck!

[Beelz] yes you are fucked, shit out of luck
now I'm complete and my cock you will suck
This world will be mine and you're first in line
you brought me the pick and now you shall both die!

[JB] Wait! Wait! Wait!
you motherfucker
we challenge you to a rock off!
give us one chance to rock your socks off

[Beelz] Fuck, fuck, fuck
the demon code prevents me
from declining a rock off challenge
what are your terms? what is the catch?

[JB] If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell.
and also you will have to pay our rent

[Beelz] And what if *i* win?

[JB] then you can take Kage back to hell...
[KG] What?
[JB] trust me Kage, its the only way,
[KG] What the fuck are you talking about?
[JB] to be your little bitch.

[Beelz]
Fine! Let the rock off begin!ha ha
I'm the devil i love metal!
Check this riff it's fucking tasty
I'm the devil i can do what i want,
whatever i got I'm gonna flaunt,
there's never been a rock off that I've ever lost
i cant wait to take Kage back to hell
I'm gonna fill him with my hot demon gel
I'll make him squeal like my scarlet pimpernel

[JB] No!
c'mon Kage bring the thunder
[KG] there's just no way that we can win,
that was a masterpiece.
[JB] listen to me
[KG] he rocks too hard because he's not a mortal man
[JB] goddamn-it Kage,
he gonna make you his sex slave,
you're gonna gargle mayonnaise
unless we bust a massive monster mama-jam.
[KG] dude, we've been through so much shit,
[JB] deactivated lasers with my dick
[BOTH] now its time to blow this fucker down!
[JB] C'mon Kage now it's time to blow doors down
[KG] I hear you Jables now it's time to blow doors down
[JB] Light up the stage cause its time for a showdown
[KG] We'll bend you over then we'll take you around town
[BOTH] Now we've got to blow this fucker down
[KG] He's gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down
[JB] C'mon Kage cause it's time to blow doors down
[KG] Oh we'll piledrive ya, it's time for the smackdown
[JB] Hey anti-christ-er, Beelzeboss,
we know your weakness our rocket-sauce
we rock the casbah, and blow your mind
we will defeat you, for all mankind
you hold the scepter,
we hold the key
you are the devil,
we are the D [18x]

[Beelz]
You guys are fuckin' lame. Come on Kage, You're coming with me.
Taste my lightning fuckers!

[Tenacious D:]
[JB] NO!

[Beelz]
ow! Fuck!
My fuckin' horn!
oh no!

[JB] From whence you came you shall remain,
until you are complete again

[Beelz]
No! Fuck you Kage and Fuck you Jables!
I'll get you Tenacious D!

 

[*Fee]

Miss Lucy had some leeches
Her leeches liked to suck
And when they drank up all her blood she didn't give a ...
Funny when the doctors
Had locked her in her cell
Miss Lucy screamed all night that they should go to bloody ...
Hello to the surgeon
With scalpel old and blunt
He'll tie you to the table then he'll mutilate your ...
Come it's nearly teatime
The lunatics arrive
The keepers bleed them all until there's no one left a ...
Lively little rodents
Are eaten up by cats
We're subject to experiments like laboratory ...
Rats I've dropped a teacup
How easily they break
I'm on my hands and knees until I pay for my mis-
Take off all your clothing
We've only just begun
We have no anesthesia
It's eighteen forty...
One thing we should tell you
Before you try again
The tests are all invented by a lot of filthy ...
Mentally hysteric
She's failed the exam
Don't bother telling Lucy for she doesn't give a ...
Damn that nitrous oxide
For when you can't escape
They say the surgeons oft commit a murder or a ...
Razor-blades are rusty
And not a lot of fun
So when they try to amputate your legs you'd better ...
Run and fetch the chemist
A patient's feeling sad
She's been in chains for ages and she isn't even ...
Madness is a nuicanse
And no one is immune
Your sister, mum or daughter may become a raving ...
Lunatics are dangerous
And doctors are obeyed
They also go together just like toast and marma-
Ladies are like children
With brains the size of squirrels
Let's give clitoridectomies to all the little ...
Girls are helpless trasures
That daddies must protect
So lie upon the table for the doctors to in-
Speculums are super
And stirrups all the rage
So spread a lady's legs then put her back into her ...
Cage of naked crazies
The surgeon's here to bleed
The doctors all are learned men and some can even ...
Reading can be risky
For women on the verge
It only did us worlds of good to poison, leech and ...
Purging is a penance
Phlebotomy's a chore
No need to sterilize the tools we never did be-
Fore the night is over
Before you go to bed
They'll take a hammer and a nail and jam it in your ...
Headstones in the courtyard
And statues in the park
Are not for the insane
Just leave them rotting in the
D
A
R
K
Dark, dark, dark, dark, dark
​

 

[*Fee]

Oh how do you do, young Willy McBride
Do you mind if I sit here down by your graveside
And rest for a while in the warm summer sun
I've been walking all day, and I'm nearly done
And I see by your gravestone you were only nineteen
When you joined the great falling in 1916
Well I hope you died quick
And I hope you died clean
Or Willy McBride, was is it slow and obscene

Did they beat the drums slowly
Did they play the fife lowly
Did they sound the death march as they lowered you down
Did the band play the last post and chorus
Did the pipes play the flowers of the forest

And did you leave a wife or a sweetheart behind
In some loyal heart is your memory enshrined
And though you died back in 1916
To that loyal heart you're forever nineteen
Or are you a stranger without even a name
Forever enshrined behind some old glass pane
In an old photograph torn, tattered, and stained
And faded to yellow in a brown leather frame

Did they beat the drums slowly
Did they play the fife lowly
Did they sound the death march as they lowered you down
Did the band play the last post and chorus
Did the pipes play the flowers of the forest

The sun shining down on these green fields of France
The warm wind blows gently and the red poppies dance
The trenches have vanished long under the plow
No gas, no barbed wire, no guns firing now
But here in this graveyard that's still no mans land
The countless white crosses in mute witness stand
To man's blind indifference to his fellow man
And a whole generation were butchered and damned

Did they beat the drums slowly
Did they play the fife lowly
Did they sound the death march as they lowered you down
Did the band play the last post and chorus
Did the pipes play the flowers of the forest

And I can't help but wonder oh Willy McBride
Do all those who lie here know why they died
Did you really believe them when they told you the cause
Did you really believe that this war would end wars
Well the suffering, the sorrow, the glory, the shame
The killing and dying it was all done in vain
Oh Willy McBride it all happened again
And again, and again, and again, and again

Did they beat the drums slowly
Did they play the fife lowly
Did they sound the death march as they lowered you down
Did the band play the last post and chorus
Did the pipes play the flowers of the forest​

 

[Hex]

Neulich hatte ich eine Unterhaltung mit meinem Manager,
es ging um mich und Musik und das ich nicht mehr weiss
ob die menschen in dieser schweren zeit, überhaupt noch bereit sind,
sich mit meinen kranken Gedanken zu befassen,
vielleicht sollt ich es lassen und was nützliches tun,
doch er sagte nun aber stopp, du unterschätzt das Bedürfniss der Leute nach Pop.
Wann wenn nicht jetzt, musst du sie mit deinen Worten begeistern,
eine erbauliche Melodie, die ihnen hilft einen Tag nach den andrem zu meistern,
na wenn das so ist, hier hat ihr sie:

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Vielleicht schon heute abend, vielleicht in einem Jahr,
doch alle werden sterben traurig aber wahr.

Okay, vielleicht war das nicht das was man in einer gemütlichen Runde singt,
was meinen Manager aber nicht stört, sagt er, denn die Hook hat erheblichen Ohrwurm-charakter.
Stellt euch einen Männerchor auf nem Piratenschiff oder ein haufen Penner vor, die zu diesem Hauptriff mitsingen.
Könnt ihr mir den Gefallen tun, bitte? drei , vier...

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Da gibt es kein Entrinnen.Da hofft ich,wer ist tot.
Die Party ist zu ende.Bald sind alle tot.

TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT!

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Vielleicht bei Zähneputzen, vielleicht beim Abendbrot.
Doch irgendwann passiert es, dann sind alle tot....

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Die Türen sind verschlossen, die Ampel steht auf rot,
der Zug ist abgefahren, bald sind alle ... TOT!

 

[Tomatentöter]

Neulich hatte ich eine Unterhaltung mit meinem Manager,
es ging um mich und Musik und das ich nicht mehr weiss
ob die menschen in dieser schweren zeit, überhaupt noch bereit sind,
sich mit meinen kranken Gedanken zu befassen,
vielleicht sollt ich es lassen und was nützliches tun,
doch er sagte nun aber stopp, du unterschätzt das Bedürfniss der Leute nach Pop.
Wann wenn nicht jetzt, musst du sie mit deinen Worten begeistern,
eine erbauliche Melodie, die ihnen hilft einen Tag nach den andrem zu meistern,
na wenn das so ist, hier hat ihr sie:

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Vielleicht schon heute abend, vielleicht in einem Jahr,
doch alle werden sterben traurig aber wahr.

Okay, vielleicht war das nicht das was man in einer gemütlichen Runde singt,
was meinen Manager aber nicht stört, sagt er, denn die Hook hat erheblichen Ohrwurm-charakter.
Stellt euch einen Männerchor auf nem Piratenschiff oder ein haufen Penner vor, die zu diesem Hauptriff mitsingen.
Könnt ihr mir den Gefallen tun, bitte? drei , vier...

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Da gibt es kein Entrinnen.Da hofft ich,wer ist tot.
Die Party ist zu ende.Bald sind alle tot.

TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT! TOT!

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Vielleicht bei Zähneputzen, vielleicht beim Abendbrot.
Doch irgendwann passiert es, dann sind alle tot....

Wir werden alle sterben, haltet euch bereit.
Die Zeichen sind eindeutig, bald ist es so weit.
Die Türen sind verschlossen, die Ampel steht auf rot,
der Zug ist abgefahren, bald sind alle ... TOT!

Ah, du hast ne neue Lieblingsband

 

[Hex]

Ah, du hast ne neue Lieblingsband

Nein, ich finde sie nur gut,...aber meine Lieblingsband ist und bleibt VOLBEAT!!!!

 

[Hex]

Settle down for a moment cause your heart is beating hard
Baby you've been my lover, and I told you from the start
Better no promises, and I'll do you no harm
But you're keep on the question I tell you not to pop
But maybe it's been a hurting, it's been hurting from the start
Do you not coping then tear it apart

Never wanted it this way
Oh baby I'm dying I'm crying over it
Maybe you feel it to, oh baby I'm blue

A barren winter came over and your mood was like a fire
7 years and a summer, and you still sit there cry
You're better without me, and you're one of a kind

If I knew that December should bring a silent part
Shaded truth and partisian between disperated lines
Truly now drifting alone in the dark

Never wanted it this way
Oh baby I'm dying I'm crying over it
Maybe you feel it to, oh baby I'm blue

Well it's over and a letter is flying high
Out the window to catch a hand of thine
Could the founder release it's bloody words
Scream the anger and sorrow of a girl

But you're keep on the question I tell you not to pop
But maybe it's been a hurting, it's been hurting from the start
Do you not coping then tear it apart

Never wanted it this way
Oh baby I'm dying I'm crying over it
Maybe you feel it to, oh baby I'm blue
Maybe you feel it to, baby I'm blue

 

[Hex]

Ich bin in einer finsteren Sekte
Die in mir die Erkenntnis weckte
Daß unsere kurze Daseinsfrist
Mehr Spaß macht, wenn man böse ist
Nun hat man mich zwar gut erzogen
Hab nie geklaut, hab nie gelogen
Doch künftig werd ich danach streben
Mich ganz dem Bösen hinzugeben

Ich will bei Rot über die Ampel gehen
Besonders wenn es kleine Kinder sehen
Die Gabel mit der Rechten fassen
Und den anderen baumeln lassen
Ich eß Nutella mit dem Löffel
Und mit Messer schneid ich Kartöffel
Und gibt es nur noch 2 Wurstscheiben
Dann nehm ich genau diese beiden

Böse !

Ich öffne gleich am 1.Dezember
Alle Türchen vom Weihnachtskalender
Ich will im Beisein anderer flüstern
Ich will im Kino mit Papier rumknistern
Mit neuen Hosen auf Bäume steigen
Mit nackten Finger auf Menschen zeigen
In Gesprächen dazwischen plappern
Popel fressen, Fingernägel knabbern

Böse !

Ich mach in Zukunft meine Schuhe
Immer nur mit einem Knoten zu´e
Die Hände immer in den Hosentaschen
Und nach dem Zähne putzen heimlich naschen
3x in den Apfel beißen
Und danach den Rest wegschmeißen
Auf fremden Klo´s in Stehen pissen
Danach nicht spülen, Deckel nicht schließen

Böse !

 

[*Fee]

How do you show someone you love
That they are the one
So many ways to express love
It's hard to choose just one
How you gonna do it

Some people like to kiss, some people like to hug,
Some lesbians like eating each other's shit out of a cup
Some people say "i love you," some even shout it out
Some people puke semi-digested shit into each other's mouths

Sometimes making love's not enough,
You have to step it up
And urinating on her face
Is not enough to say "i love you"

Some people like to kiss, some people like to hug,
Some lesbians like eating each other's shit out of a cup
Some people say "i love you," some even shout it out
Some people puke semi-digested shit into each other's mouths

She's covered in vomit and human feces
That's how i know that she needs me​

 

[Hex]

Forest

Walk with me my little child,
To the forest of denial,
Speak with me my only mind,
Walk with me until the time,
And make the forest turn to wine,
You take the legend for a fall,
You saw the product,

Why can't you see that you are my child,
Why don't you know that you are my mind,
Tell everyone in the world, that I'm you,
Take this promise to the end of you.

Walk with me my little friend,
Take this promise to the end,
Speak with me my only mind,
Walk with me until the end,
And make the forest turn to sand,
You take the legend for a fall,
You saw the product,

Why can't you see that you are my child,
Why don't you know that you are my mind,
Tell everyone in the world, that I'm you,
Take this promise to the end of you.

Take this promise for a ride,
You saw the forest, now come inside,
You took the legend for its fall,
You saw the product of it all,
No televisions in the air,
No circumcisions on the chair,
You made the weapons for us all,
Just look at us now,

Why can't you see that you are my child,
Why don't you know that you are my mind,
Tell everyone in the world, that I'm you,
Take this promise to the end of you.

 

[Northern Death]

Timerunner

Enduring nights engulfed in tears
Can you make room to ease my fears
I thought I wouldn’t miss your face
But now the pain just drives me insane
I guess it is meant to be today
That our lives divide in separate ways
It wasn’t you, it wasn’t me
It was the destiny we chose

Somewhere in time
Our love and anger fill the skies with tears
And we still believe our faith will be fulfilled
Somewhere in time
Somewhere in time
It couldn’t be more perfect than right now
I still remember ever single tear
Somewhere in time

My days go by in black and white
I just can’t seem to find the light
And I go out in search of prey
to just unveil the pain I feel
Now I am just lying to myself
I've got no reason to survive
Because without you I can’t see clear
Now who will pick me when I fall

I break through barriers to emerge
To claim the throne I once possessed
I am just a man, you are my soul
You are the reason I grow old

 

[Riv]

Kennst Du den Urknall aus dem Horn?
Kennst Du den Grund für der Nordmannen Zorn?
Klar wie das Wasser aus unseren Tälern,
Gelb wie reife Weizenähren,
Aus dem Fasse muss es fliessen,
Damit wir Schlacht und Sieg begiessen.

MET, MET, MET, MET, MET, MET!

Hoch im Norden, tief im Nebel
Wo die Mannen mit Njørd segeln
Dort wolln wir im Kampfe die Äxte schwingen
Nach der Jagdzeit am Feuer singen
Die Hörner und die Humpen heben
Der Met, der ist ein Aasensegen

MET, MET, MET, MET, MET, MET!​

 

[Roth]

En skikkelse lå der på bakken
så vond at de blomster rundt visnet
en dyster sjel lå der på bakken
så kald at alt vann ble til is
En skygge da falt over skogen

da skikkelsens sjel visnet bort
for skikkelsens sjel var en skygge
en skygge av vondskapens makt

 

[Tomatentöter]

a long long time ago
i can still remember
when my laptop could connect elsewhere

and i tell you all there was a day
the network card i threw away
had a purpose - and worked for you and me....

But 18 years completely wasted
with each address we've aggregated
the tables overflowing
the traffic just stopped flowing....

And now we're bearing all the scars
and all my traceroutes showing stars...
the packets would travel faster in cars...
the day....the routers died

Chorus (ALL!!!!!)

So bye bye, folks at RIPE 55
Be persuaded to upgrade it or your network will die
IPv6 just makes me let out a sigh
But I spose we'd better give it a try
I suppose we'd better give it a try

Now did you write an RFC
That dictated how we all should be
Did we listen like we should that day

Now were you back at RIPE fifty-four
Where we heard the same things months before
And the people knew they'd have to change their ways....

And we - knew that all the ISPs
Could be - future proof for centuries

But that was then not now
Spent too much time playing WoW

ooh there was time we sat on IRC
Making jokes on how this day would be
Now there's no more use for TCP
The day the routers died...
Chorus (chime in now)

So bye bye, folks at RIPE 55
Be persuaded to upgrade it or your network will die
IPv6 just makes me let out a sigh
But I spose we'd better give it a try
I suppose we'd better give it a try

I remember those old days I mourn
Sitting in my room, downloading porn
Yeah that's how it used to be....

When the packets flowed from A to B
via routers that could talk IP
There was data..that could be exchanged between you and me....

Oh but - I could see you all ignore
The fact - we'd fill up IPv4

But we all lost the nerve
And we got what we deserved!

And while...we threw our network kit away
And wished we'd heard the things they say
Put all our lives in disarray

The day...the routers died...
Chorus (those silent will be shot)

So bye bye, folks at RIPE 55
Be persuaded to upgrade it or your network will die
IPv6 just makes me let out a sigh
But I spose we'd better give it a try
I suppose we'd better give it a try

Saw a man with whom I used to peer
Asked him to rescue my career
He just sighed and turned away..

I went down to the net cafe
that I used to visit everyday
But the man there said I might as well just leave...

And now we've all lost our purpose..
my cisco shares completely worthless...

No future meetings for me
At the Hotel Krasnapolsky

and the men that make us push and push
Like Geoff Huston and Randy Bush
Should've listened to what they told us....
The day...the routers....died
Chorus (time to lose your voice)

So bye bye, folks at RIPE 55
Be persuaded to upgrade it or your network will die
IPv6 just makes me let out a sigh
But I spose we'd better give it a try
I suppose we'd better give it a try






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