25,000 before W:O:A 2007

[Sevren]

In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

Any thinking overkill

 

[Sevren]

I saw two kangaroos having it off in the middle of the road. So I hit them, which caused me to ejaculate through the sunroof.

 

[Sevren]

I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

Lucky he was not found by Kangaroos

 

[Sevren]

The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end.

 

[Sevren]

I pulled in to the side of the road because there was smoke coming from under the hood. I realized there was a fire in the engine, so I took my dog and smothered it with a blanket.

 

[Sevren]

The claimant had collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were -
Q: What warning was given by you?
A: Horn.
Q: What warning was given by the other party?
A: Moo.

 

[Sevren]

Who is to Blame?

No one was to blame for the accident but it would never have happened if the other driver had been alert.

 

[Sevren]

I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight.

 

[Sevren]

I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

 

[Sevren]

The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

Must have been me in the other car

 

[Sevren]

I was going at about 70 or 80 mph when my girlfriend reached over and grabbed my testicles so I lost control.

Wouldn't we all

 

[Sevren]

I was on the way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

Painful no matter which way you look at it

 

[Sevren]

On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke.

 

[Sevren]

The accident was caused by me waving to the man I hit last week.

Breaking news Queen in carriage accident.

 

[Sevren]

Windshield broke. Cause unknown. Probably Voodoo.