100K in 100 DAYS before WOA:08!!
- Ersteller Smoo_lord
- Erstellt am
-
Als neues Loginsystem benutzen wir die Wacken.ID. Damit du deinen jetzigen Account im Wacken Forum mit der Wacken.ID verknüpfen kannst, klicke bitte auf den Link und trage deine E-Mail Adresse ein, die du auch hier im Forum benutzt. Ein User mit deinem Benutzernamen und deiner E-Mail Adresse wird dann automatisch angelegt. Du bekommst dann eine E-Mail und musst deine Wacken.ID bestätigen.
Sollte es Probleme geben, schreibt uns bitte.
Klicke hier, um deinen Account in eine Wacken.ID zu migrireren.
LooseCannon
W:O:A Metalhead
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
Zuletzt bearbeitet:
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
A guy comes home completely drunk one night. He lurches through the
door and is met by his scowling wife, who is most definitely not happy.
"Where the hell have you been all night?" she demands.
"At this new bar," he says. "The Golden Saloon. Everything there is golden.
It's got huge golden doors, a golden floor and even the urinal's gold!"
The wife still doesn't believe his story, and the next day checks the
phone book, finding a place across town called the Golden Saloon.
She calls up the place to check her husband's story.
"Is this the Golden Saloon?" she asks when the bartender answers the
phone.
"Yes it is," bartender answers.
"Do you have huge golden doors?"
"Sure do." "Do you have golden floors?"
"Most certainly do."
"What about golden urinals?"
There's a long pause, then the woman hears the bartender yelling,
"Hey, Duke, I think I got a lead on the guy that pissed in your
saxophone last night!"
door and is met by his scowling wife, who is most definitely not happy.
"Where the hell have you been all night?" she demands.
"At this new bar," he says. "The Golden Saloon. Everything there is golden.
It's got huge golden doors, a golden floor and even the urinal's gold!"
The wife still doesn't believe his story, and the next day checks the
phone book, finding a place across town called the Golden Saloon.
She calls up the place to check her husband's story.
"Is this the Golden Saloon?" she asks when the bartender answers the
phone.
"Yes it is," bartender answers.
"Do you have huge golden doors?"
"Sure do." "Do you have golden floors?"
"Most certainly do."
"What about golden urinals?"
There's a long pause, then the woman hears the bartender yelling,
"Hey, Duke, I think I got a lead on the guy that pissed in your
saxophone last night!"
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.
One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?"
When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
"God Almighty !" shouted Mary.
The teacher said, "Very good!" and Mary fell back to sleep.
A while later the teacher asked Mary, "Who is our Lord and Savior?", but Mary didn't even stir from her slumber.
Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Mary.
The teacher said, "Very good!" and Mary fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?"
Again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, "If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!"
One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?"
When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
"God Almighty !" shouted Mary.
The teacher said, "Very good!" and Mary fell back to sleep.
A while later the teacher asked Mary, "Who is our Lord and Savior?", but Mary didn't even stir from her slumber.
Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Mary.
The teacher said, "Very good!" and Mary fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?"
Again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, "If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!"
agresionpower
W:O:A Metalgod
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
When Ariel Sharon came to Washington for meetings with George W. and
for a state dinner, Laura Bush decided to bring in a special Kosher chef
and offer a truly Jewish meal.
At the dinner that night, the first course served is matzo ball soup.
George W. looks at this and after learning what it is called, he
tells an aide that he can't eat such a gross and strange-looking brew. The
aide says that Mr. Sharon will be insulted if he doesn't at least
taste it.
Not wanting to cause any trouble (after all, he ate sheep's eye
in honor of Arab guests), George W. gingerly lowers his spoon into the
bowl and retrieves a piece of matzo ball and some broth. He hesitates,
then swallows.
A big grin appears on his face. He finds that he really likes it, so
he digs right in and finishes the whole bowl.
"That was delicious," Bush says to Sharon. "Do you Jews eat any other
part of the matzo, or just the balls?"
for a state dinner, Laura Bush decided to bring in a special Kosher chef
and offer a truly Jewish meal.
At the dinner that night, the first course served is matzo ball soup.
George W. looks at this and after learning what it is called, he
tells an aide that he can't eat such a gross and strange-looking brew. The
aide says that Mr. Sharon will be insulted if he doesn't at least
taste it.
Not wanting to cause any trouble (after all, he ate sheep's eye
in honor of Arab guests), George W. gingerly lowers his spoon into the
bowl and retrieves a piece of matzo ball and some broth. He hesitates,
then swallows.
A big grin appears on his face. He finds that he really likes it, so
he digs right in and finishes the whole bowl.
"That was delicious," Bush says to Sharon. "Do you Jews eat any other
part of the matzo, or just the balls?"
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster
Hillary Clinton goes to a primary school in Ithaca, New York to talk about the world.
After her talk she offers question time.
One little boy puts up his hand, and the Senator asks him what his name is.
"Kenneth."
"And what is your question, Kenneth?"
"I have three questions:
First - whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
And third - whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?"
Just then the bell rings for recess. Hillary Clinton informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume Hillary says, "Okay where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?"
A different little boy puts his hand up; Hillary points him out and asks him what his name is.
"Larry."
"And what is your question?"
"I have five questions:
First - whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
Third - whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?
Fourth - why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early?
And fifth - what happened to Kenneth?"
After her talk she offers question time.
One little boy puts up his hand, and the Senator asks him what his name is.
"Kenneth."
"And what is your question, Kenneth?"
"I have three questions:
First - whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
And third - whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?"
Just then the bell rings for recess. Hillary Clinton informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume Hillary says, "Okay where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?"
A different little boy puts his hand up; Hillary points him out and asks him what his name is.
"Larry."
"And what is your question?"
"I have five questions:
First - whatever happened to your medical health care plan?
Second - why would you run for President after your husband shamed the office?
Third - whatever happened to all those things you took when you left the White House?
Fourth - why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early?
And fifth - what happened to Kenneth?"
agresionpower
W:O:A Metalgod
gee jay
W:O:A Metalmaster