150K Before WOA 2010

[xforeverxmetalx]

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeders, a State Policeman sees a car puttering along at 22 miles per hour. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"

So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are five blondes - two in the front and three in the back of the car - wide-eyed and white as ghosts.

The driver is obviously confused, and says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"

"Ma'am," the officer replies, "you weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly - twenty-two miles an hour," the old woman said proudly.

The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.

"But before I let you go, Ma'am," the officer says, "I have to ask... Is everyone in this car okay? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time."

"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute, officer. We just got off Route 119."

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

One day, three friends go hunting. Only one is very good, so the second two plan to watch him and learn from what he does.

They arrive at the hunting cabin, and get all set up. The next day, the first hunter goes out. He returns with a big deer. The second two guys ask him how he did that. They can't believe how big the deer is.

"It was easy. Found the tracks, followed the tracks, BAM! Shot the deer."

The next day, the second hunter goes out, and comes back with an even bigger deer. The third guy's eyes bug out when he sees it, and he asks him how he did it.

"Same thing the first guy did. Found the tracks, followed the tracks, BAM! Shot the deer."

So on the third day, the last guy goes out to hunt. He doesn't come back for a very long time. When he staggers into the cabin, rifle gone, all beat up and bruised, with only one boot, the other two are very surprised.

They ask him what happened.

"Well, I found the tracks, followed the tracks and BAM! Got run over by a train."

 

[Franzi K.]

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night and went to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?"

Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.

"Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell you?"

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "Watson, you idiot. Somebody has stolen our tent."

^^ nice

 

[Franzi K.]

well I'm going to watch some more episodes of EMERGENCY ROOM - season 3 see you all

 

[toastie]

no you're not, you hate them

Maybe I'm emo and i hate myself.

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

Maybe I'm emo and i hate myself.

then leave this forum for good

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

well I'm going to watch some more episodes of EMERGENCY ROOM - season 3 see you all

see you then

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, then slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house.

A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"

The blonde replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, 'You've got mail!'"

 

[Franzi K.]

heey, such discriminations in here?

 

[xforeverxmetalx]

heey, such discriminations in here?

I have nothing against blondes but they do make for good jokes

 

[Franzi K.]

well I'm gone bye

 

[toastie]

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, then slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house.

A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"

The blonde replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, 'You've got mail!'"

Wahahahaha

 

[Quark]

Wat denk ik nu?

 

[Quark]

Wat denk ik nu?

Ik heb geen idee.

 

[Quark]

Wat denk ik nu?

Ik heb geen idee.

Maar met deze uitspraak heb ik wel weer 2 postings toegevoegd aan mijn postcount!