xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
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xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
Franzi K.
W:O:A Metalhead
she got you
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
toastie
W:O:A Metalmaster
- 11 Juli 2008
- 22.972
- 1
- 81
weil du mich verstehen kannst
You can understand me, too but you're not german.
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
You can understand me, too but you're not german.
not born in Germany, no, but after English and French, my heritage is mostly German
besides, you're writing in English
Franzi K.
W:O:A Metalhead
apropos "tja", I often tried to find an english translation for this nice little word.. but I'm afraid there is none, is that right 
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
apropos "tja", I often tried to find an english translation for this nice little word.. but I'm afraid there is none, is that right
probably not exactly... but I see it as "yea" or something, dunno though
toastie
W:O:A Metalmaster
- 11 Juli 2008
- 22.972
- 1
- 81
not born in Germany, no, but after English and French, my heritage is mostly German
besides, you're writing in English
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
Things I learned from the movies
During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.
All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French Bread.
It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.
The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. Nobody will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty. There is never any dust or lint in the ventilation ducts.
If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more ammunition - even if you haven't been carrying any before now.
You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.
The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.
Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the refrigerator door and use that light instead.
At night, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat it.
Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames or explode.
The Chief of Police will always suspend his star detective or give him 48 hours to finish the job.
A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a baseball stadium.
Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
Although in the present day it is possible to fire weapons at an object out of our visual range, people of the 23rd century will have lost this technology.
Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending phone conversations. It only wastes time.
All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red digital readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts. Your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment.
During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.
All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French Bread.
It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.
The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. Nobody will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty. There is never any dust or lint in the ventilation ducts.
If you need to reload your gun, you will always have more ammunition - even if you haven't been carrying any before now.
You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.
The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.
Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the refrigerator door and use that light instead.
At night, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat it.
Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames or explode.
The Chief of Police will always suspend his star detective or give him 48 hours to finish the job.
A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a baseball stadium.
Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
Although in the present day it is possible to fire weapons at an object out of our visual range, people of the 23rd century will have lost this technology.
Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending phone conversations. It only wastes time.
All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red digital readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts. Your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment.
toastie
W:O:A Metalmaster
- 11 Juli 2008
- 22.972
- 1
- 81
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night and went to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.
"Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell you?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "Watson, you idiot. Somebody has stolen our tent."
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.
"Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell you?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "Watson, you idiot. Somebody has stolen our tent."
xforeverxmetalx
W:O:A Metalgod
- 29 Dez. 2007
- 97.363
- 7
- 123
A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table.
The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raising the roof. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. Up jumps the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in the center is a beautifully framed children's jigsaw puzzle. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "What's all the chanting and celebration about?"
The blonde who brought in the picture explains, "Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together.
"The side of the box said 2 to 4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!"
The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raising the roof. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. Up jumps the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"
The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in the center is a beautifully framed children's jigsaw puzzle. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "What's all the chanting and celebration about?"
The blonde who brought in the picture explains, "Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together.
"The side of the box said 2 to 4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!"