So yeah, I hear Alrek is very excited about getting totally shit-faced for the what appears to be the first time. the problem with this is he has had to wait too long for this and will probably drink WAY TOO MUCH. Which will cause him to puke up EVERYWHEREand most likely, as we'll all be sitting in a group when that happens, over all of us. this, being totally disgusting and we also very inebriated will cause us to start vomiting as well. Neighbors in wacken are always nearby, they in turn, upon seeing us vomiting will begin to hurl up their insides. Blasting chunks will spread like wildfire though wacken, worse than the mud from last year, we will all be drenched in it. http://tinyurl.com/d4tn2 Eventually it will spread to wacken town. Wacken will be covered in vomit. Innocent people driving by will turn the stomach upside down and start vomiting all over their steering wheels....the vomiting will spread to the highways, and eventually to the more populated areas and then of course... hamburg will be awash in foul smelling, half liquid, extra chunky puke. this puke will roll onwards like a putrid lava flowing through the streets. It will moslty end up in the Elbe river. Everything north from there a giant mass of regurgitated food and beer. http://tinyurl.com/7uf54 eventually, as the city's cleaning services will fall apart due to the onslaught of barfing, the elbe will overflow with upchucked mass and will spread out towards the rest of europe, faster than Napoleon, Hitler and Pokemon put together. spew, keck, retched up matter will cover the landscape, making the whole of europe look like france. so please, Alrek, do us a favour. and don't drink too much the first night.